“Avoid stress” she said

My life is a big ball of stress.

I used to make lists and write myself notes of things I needed to do and had to do. But now I am lucky somedays to be able to see the blur I am trying to type or write up.
That stresses me out.

I am an OCD momma who is too fatigued most days to organize and perform my obsessive compulsive activities which keep me sane.
That stresses me out.

My brain is on hyperactive overload while my body is trying to walk through wet concrete. Which includes me thinking about every little thing when I am trying to sit and relax and also in bed trying to sleep.
That stresses me out.

I want all my house-cleaning and organizing stuff to be all done now, or at least by 3pm on Saturday. And I am not even close to being done.
That really stresses me out.

When I was first diagnosed with MS, my doctor said that I have two important things I need to avoid in order to get better: “Don’t get sick and avoid stress”

Well, good grief, I was getting sick constantly for about a year which made things terrible, but thankfully I have been quite well since being home full-time. However, that stress thing is just hanging around and not giving me a chance to be level and is starting to cause more problems.
That stresses me out.

Today was incredibly stressful, but I have to have faith that tomorrow will be a better day. It just has to be… I need it to be… ok, that’s enough complaining on my end for today.
Because complaining and dwelling on it stresses me out.

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